My husband was older than life and he pulled people towards him. He was a retired Metropolitan Police sergeant who had trained hundreds of police officers in advanced high-speed driving. He was a magical driver who could reverse at high speed and throw a cigarette at the same time. We decided to get married when Steve was diagnosed with end-stage prostate cancer. We knew we did not have much time, but he was strong and full of life and we were determined to spend his last days together. I promised I would not leave his side. In the days after the wedding, his health began to deteriorate. Eight days later I called an ambulance and when he came to be removed, I thought I would never see him again. In fact, I would see him again when he was taken out of the Cpap machine, because then nothing more could be done for him. Steve was vulnerable to the virus because his lungs were already damaged. In 2012, our apartment caught fire and Steve tried in vain to put it out. He ran outside to get some fresh air, but the door slammed behind him, leaving me inside. He broke down this door and saved my life, but in the process he inhaled smoke that would leave marks on his lungs. Due to his medical history, we were told categorically that he was not a candidate for ventilation. Steve told this news alone in the hospital room. I had promised him when we learned about the cancer that I would be by his side until the end and I had to break that promise. That was the hardest part for me. He died one day before his 66th birthday, on October 18. I planned the funeral for the anniversary of the day we survived the fire, November 3, a date we considered our common birthday. The funeral was beautiful, but nowhere was it as big as it could be. They only allowed 30 people in a building that could hold 100 and many friends had to stand outside. After they lowered the coffin to the grave, I sat at home with my children and grandchildren, but we could not celebrate his life with the others. We did the right thing, we did what millions of people did to stop the virus from spreading – I would not wish Covid my worst enemy. We did not do what the people in the government did. I was one of those invited to go to Downing Street to meet with the Prime Minister last year as a member of the Covid-19 Beeaved Families for Justice support group. We were given a few minutes to talk about the people we had lost. I have told my story to so many and it is so shocking that I never fail to impress people, but I could not see any shiver of compassion or pain behind Boris Johnson’s eyes. Finally, we know that he violated his own rules of social distancing, but I’m not surprised. If he was a decent man he would have given up a long time ago. He made decisions that led to the death of hundreds of thousands. There were so many moments we could have acted earlier – over PPE, over masks, over social distance. The same goes for Sunak. he knew the pandemic was not over when he encouraged people to eat out and mingle in the summer of 2020, leading to the wave of infections that my husband would get. He chose the economy from people’s lives. Losing someone you love is awful under any circumstances, but losing someone you know could have been prevented is unthinkable. For whatever reason, these politicians and advisers thought they were untouched by the virus and public opinion. The least they can do now is recognize that people are still dying, continue to develop long-term Covid, and do something to ensure that other lives are not taken away too soon.
